游戏币 Yóuxì bì
In a market on Xinjiang Street in Changchun, there is a small shop that sells wonton. An old beggar often shows up and buys something to eat with play money, which he thinks of as real currency, and the shop doesn't embarrass him, they just pay for his meals. After this report appeared in the newspapers, the feedback from readers was especially animated. On the blogs, news of an old beggar who uses play money to buy wonton was spread around, and many bloggers offered their thoughts.
Zài Chángchūn shì Xīnjiāngjiē shìchǎng, yǒu yìjiā mài húntun de xiǎodiàn, yí wèi xíngqǐ de lǎorén jīngcháng guānglín zhèlǐ, cháng cuò bǎ yóuxìbì dàngchéng yìngbì lái mǎi chī de, zhè jiādiàn cóngwèi chāichuān lǎorén, zhàoyàng gěi lǎorén fùhuò. Bàodào jiànbào hòu, dúzhě fǎnkuì shífēn rèliè. Wēibó shàng lǎorén yòng yóuxìbì mǎi húntun de xīnwén yě bèi duōcì zhuǎnfā, wēibó wǎngyǒu fēnfēn fābiǎo gánxiǎng.
The shop's owner is just an ordinary citizen, and isn't famous, or especially concerned with morality or ethics. When dealing with the old beggar's way of "paying the bill," he knows the situation, but avoids exposing the old man. A steaming hot bowl of wonton has made people feel the depth of warmth in this world.
馄饨店老板,一个市间小民,不算名人,更无关公德伦理之大道。面对乞讨老人的“付账”,知情而不拆穿。一碗热腾腾的馄饨,让人感受到这凡俗世间的浓浓暖情。Húntun diàn láobǎn, yí gè shì jiān xiǎomín, búsuàn míngrén, gèng wúguān gōngdé lúnlǐ zhī dàdào. Miànduì qítǎo lǎorén de "fùzhàng," zhīqíng ér bù chāichuān. Yì wǎn rèténgténg de húntun, ràng rén gǎnshòudào zhè fánsú shìjiān de nóngnóng nuǎnqíng.
The old man's hearing is not good, his eyesight is poor, and possibly it never occurs to him that the money in his hand is fake. He's bent over all day begging, and has eyes filled with sympathy or contempt cast on him. To speak of an equal exchange is wishful thinking. But as far as he knows, he takes money out of his pocket, the wonton in the bowl go into his stomach, it's an equal exchange of value; that he's eating is perfectly proper, couldn't be better. From his point of view, the meal not only satisfies his appetite, but serves as a heavy dose of dignity.
Zhī yú lǎorén, ěr bùqīng, mù bùmíng, xiǎngbì tā yě wèicéng xiǎngdào shǒuzhōng dì jǐ kuài yìngbì jìngshì jiǎ de. Píngrì lǐ bēi gōng qítǎo, nà yì shuāngshuāng tóuguò lái de huò tóngqíng huò qīngshì de yǎnshén shì hé zīwèi tā xīn zìzhī. Píngděng zhī shuō gèng shì wàngxiǎng. Ānzhào tā de líjiě, dōu zhōng yìngbì tāochū, wǎnzhōng húntun rùfù, děngjià jiāohuàn, chī dé tiānjīngdìyì, búyìlèhū. Duì tā láishuō, zhècì yòngcān bùjínjǐn zài yú mǎnzú kǒufù shēngjì, gèng shì duìyú zūnyán de yícì zhòngcháng.
Faced with this transaction, the kindly shopowner doesn't undeceive the old man, or destroy his inner calm. "This old man's life seems so hard, if I am able to help, I help, I don't even consider exposing him, I'm afraid he'll lose face and won't come back again." The sincere and honest shopowner's words turn "dignity" into "saving face," and it may be that the shopowner himself doesn't fully understand what those words mean.
面对交易,可爱的店老板并没有揭开事实,打破老人心中的平衡。“像这样生活艰难的老人,能帮上他的就帮帮,不想拆穿他是怕他觉得没面子,以后该不来了。”朴实的店家将“尊严”说成了“好面子”,可能店家自己都不知道其中的意味。Miànduì jiāoyì, kě'ài de diàn láobǎn bìng méiyǒu jiēkāi shìshí, dǎpò lǎorén xīnzhōng de pínghéng. "Xiàng zhèyàng shēnghuó jiānnán de lǎorén, néng bāng shàng tā de jiù bāngbāng, bù xiǎng chāichuān tā shì pà tā juédé méi miànzi, yǐhòu gāi bù láile." Pǔshí de diànjiā jiàng "zūnyán" shuō chéng le "hǎo miànzi," kěnéng diànjiā zìjǐ dōu bù zhīdào qízhōng dì yìwèi."
Someone lending a hand at the right time, a drought ended by a rainfall, that is what those who live in hope most need. Because of self-respect, when you have to ask for help, especially if it involves money and livelihood, it's hard to save face. Shame and humiliation aren't his fault, rather he is someone who has the burden of shame and humiliation. Nothing would hurt him more than having everyone know about his humiliation. To treat the old man as a regular customer, and not cause him to suffer, that precisely is the bridge that reaches the spirit of those who need help.
雪中送炭,旱逢甘霖,均为需者所盼。只是自尊使然,面对帮助,特别是关系钱财生计之时,难抬头脸。耻辱不是他的错,但他却是耻辱的承担者。倘若大肆张扬,对其心灵,更是一种莫大的损伤和打击。为了让老人心中不难受,不揭穿,不拆台,让其“正常”消费,正是弥合了受帮助者这一层心境。Xuězhōngsòngtàn, hànfénggān ín, jūn wéi xūzhě suǒ pàn. Zhǐshì zìzūn shǐrán, miànduì bāngzhù, tèbié shì guānxi qiáncái shēngjì zhī shí, nán tái tóuliǎn. Chírǔ bú shì tā de cuò, dàn tā quèshì chírǔ de chéngdānzhě. Tǎngruò dàsì zhāngyáng, duì qí xīn líng, gèng shì yì zhǒng mòdà de sǔnshāng hé dǎjī. Wèile ràng lǎorén xīnzhōng bù nánshòu, bù jiēchuān, bù chāitái, ràng qí "zhèngcháng" xiāofèi, zhèngshì míhé le shòu bāngzhùzhě zhè yìcéng xīnjìng."
There are quite a few people who have the psychology of the philistine towards a "beggar customer"; just because of how he looks, they would do away with him; if he came through the door, they'd reveal his trick, or chase him out. Then there are those who would give him a few wonton out of charity, just to show they are magnanimous. But this shopowner, even though he's out of the spotlight, extends a helping hand and doesn't embarrass the old man. To help others and not leave a trace, that is what gives dignity to others, and this closes the gap, as in the Buddhist saying, "Wanting others to know you've done a good thing is not a good thing."
Àn shìkuài xīnlǐ, qǐgài xiāofèi, guānxi xíngxiàng, sǎodì chūménzhě bì bú zài shǎoshù； zòngshǐ jìnmén, yě kě jiēpò zhēnxiàng, ràng lǎorén luòhuāng'értáo; zài yǒuxīn zhě, kěnéng huì shīshě jǐ gè húntun, yǐbiǎo shànxīn yìjǔ. Kě zhège diànjiā, què dàowèi bú yuèwèi, bǔ tái bù chāitái. Shī'ēn ér bù liú hénjì, liú rén zūn yán, zhèng míhé le Fóyǔ zhōng dì "hǎo shì bùrú wú shì" zhī chányì.
Here we can't help thinking of "showing mercy and expecting to be repaid," or "imposing charity on others," and many such phrases. Whether it's exchanging gifts or repaying debts of gratitude, whenever we help others, it seems we always link that help to "repaying" and "imposing." Or dressing up one's interests by investing a plum and asking for a peach in return, adopting a superior attitude by throwing money around to buy peace of mind; we never look deeply into our hearts and squarely confront the idea that the people we are helping are our equals.
这里,不禁联想起“施恩索报”“暴力慈善”的林林总总。投桃报李、知恩图报,我们在帮助人时,似乎都在纠结于“报”与“施”。或捆绑利益,投李求桃；或姿态高高,撒钱求心安。总没有从内心深处正视人格上与受助者应当完全平等。Zhèlǐ, bújīn liánxiǎng qǐ "shī'ēn suǒ bào" "bàolì císhàn" de línlínzǒngzǒng. tóutáobàolǐ, zhī'ēn túbào, wǒmen zài bāngzhù rén shí, sìhū dōu zài jiūjié yú "bào" yǔ "shī." Huò kúnbǎng lìyì, tóulǐqiútáo；huò zītài gāogāo, sā qián qiú xīn'ān. Zǒng méiyǒu cóng nèixīn shēnchù zhèngshì réngé shàng yǔ shòu zhùzhě yīngdāng wánquán píngděng.
"People are unreasonable, what they say is absurd, they are ego-centric and indifferent, but we must always love them / The good deeds you do today will be forgotten tomorrow / But that doesn't matter, you must always do good things." These words hang on the wall of Mother Teresa's home for abandoned children in Kolkota (Calcutta); the poem highlights the primary place respect has in relation to benevolence.
"Rénmen bù jiǎng dàolǐ, sīxiǎng huāngmiù, zìwǒ zhōngxīn / bùguǎnzěnyàng, zǒngshì yào ài tāmen / … … nǐ suǒzuò de shànshì míngtiān jiù bèi yíwàng / bùguǎnzěnyàng, zǒngshì yào zuò shànshì … … ” Tèlǐshā xiūnǚ chuàngbàn de Jiā'ěrgèdá "értóng zhī jiā Xīshū · Bāmǎn" qiáng shàng de shīgē tūxiǎnchū císhàn duìyú línghún zuì yuánshǐ de zūnzhòng.
[Note: Xishu Baman [Shishu Bhavan] = the name of home for abandoned children established by Mother Teresa in Calcutta 希舒.巴满 (Shishu Bhavan) 是特里莎修女 (Mother Teresa) 领导下，在印度加尔各答建立的儿童收容所。Jia'ergeda = Kolkata = Calcutta, India]
It all comes back to the original intent to keep benevolence pure and unsullied by any impurities. When you don't embarrass those who need help, when you don't insult or humiliate them, only then will you have the spirit of equality in dignity. This is the example set by the bowl of wonton, and its relation to charity.
归于本心,单存善念而不夹杂质。让受助者不别扭,不屈辱,才能看到一个个平等和得到尊重的灵魂。这一点,亦是这碗馄饨面对于慈善事业最好的示范。Guīyú běnxīn, dān cún shàn niàn ér bù jiā zázhì. Ràng shòu zhùzhě bù bièniu, bù qūrǔ, cái néng kàndào yígègè píngděng hé dédào zūnzhòng de línghún. Zhè yìdiǎn, yì shì zhè wǎn húntun miànduì yú císhànshìyè zuì hǎo de shìfàn.
Source: 《北京晨报》 2011-11/04 第C03版: "一碗馄饨的尊严" online